Asian Mental Health: Reflections from an Asian Mental Health Therapist
Jun 4 | Written by Mathew Varughese
There is no shortage of studies showing that Asians often experience a higher level of stigma surrounding mental health. Cultural values deeply embedded in many Asian communities can significantly influence whether someone seeks professional support. Personally, I’ve witnessed this resistance time and time again, especially within my own circles.
It’s interesting that Asian American and Pacific Islander (AAPI) Heritage Month and Mental Health Awareness Month both take place in May. Perhaps it’s symbolic - two critical issues converging, urging us to reflect on how culture and mental wellness intersect.
We know that untreated mental health struggles can lead to a range of negative outcomes, yet mental health is still viewed by many as a weakness. When I first expressed my interest in studying psychology and counseling after high school in Malaysia, people around me questioned my choice. "Why work with people in institutions?" they asked - because that was the only image they had of mental health treatment. The stigma was so deeply ingrained that few could imagine anyone other than those with severe mental illness needing therapy. That reaction fueled my desire to challenge these misconceptions and reduce stigma.
My journey led me to complete a bachelor’s degree in psychology and a master’s in counseling. Along the way, I encountered stories that affirmed the importance of this work. I remember an Asian international student once approached me to talk about a mental health issue after learning that I was studying counseling. He was eager for advice, but when I encouraged him to seek professional help, he flatly refused. He couldn't imagine sharing his struggles with a therapist. That reluctance wasn’t unique - over the past ten years in the U.S., I’ve spoken with many Asian international students who initially reach out to me informally but stop short of seeking therapy.
It makes sense, though. Opening up to a stranger about deeply personal concerns is not easy, especially when you come from a collectivist culture where personal matters are often kept within the family. Before becoming a licensed therapist, I went to therapy myself to understand what it felt like. I’ll admit, it was uncomfortable at first. But I also saw how beneficial it was to have a safe space to talk.
In Asian culture, it’s difficult to separate our personal struggles from our families. We often feel we can’t set boundaries or speak openly without somehow betraying those close to us. But therapy doesn’t require us to reject our culture - it allows us to explore our experiences with compassion and context.
Sadly, many Asian international students either avoid therapy altogether or stop after a negative experience. Some say their therapists didn’t understand their cultural background and left them feeling dismissed. I’ve heard too many stories like this, enough to know that change is needed, both within our communities and within the field of mental health itself.
So, I want to share a few thoughts that might help someone from an Asian background have a more positive experience with therapy:
1. Understand the stigma
Mental health is heavily stigmatized in many Asian communities. Talking to a stranger about personal issues can be seen as “airing dirty laundry” or bringing shame to the family. But just because something has been done a certain way for generations doesn’t mean it’s the only or best way. If you’re hesitant about therapy, ask yourself why. Would those same concerns stop you from seeing a doctor for a physical illness? You wouldn’t refuse treatment for a broken bone just because the doctor doesn’t know you - mental health deserves the same respect and care.
2. Give therapists a chance
Not all therapists will immediately understand your cultural context - and that’s okay. Culturally competent therapists strive to learn and adapt, but sometimes you might be the first person to help them understand a different perspective. That doesn’t mean you have to teach them everything, but a little openness can go a long way in building mutual understanding.
3. Find someone you connect with
Therapy is a relationship. Just like with any other relationship, connection matters. If you’re from a collectivist culture, it might feel strange to talk to someone who’s not part of your community, but therapy doesn’t have to feel cold or clinical. Ask questions. Get to know your therapist. The therapeutic alliance, the bond between client and therapist, is one of the most important factors in successful therapy outcomes.
4. It’s okay to switch therapists
Sometimes it just doesn’t click - and that’s perfectly normal. You wouldn’t keep doing group projects with a classmate you didn’t work well with, so don’t feel obligated to stay with a therapist who isn’t a good fit. Seeking someone else is not a failure. it’s part of finding the right support.
This list isn’t exhaustive, and I’m not claiming to speak for all Asians or all mental health professionals. These insights come from my personal experiences and the many conversations I’ve had with Asian international students over the years.
If there’s one thing I want you to take away, it’s this: You deserve to be heard. Your experiences are valid. And therapy may be the first step toward reclaiming your mental wellness.